IN THIS EPISODE, WE TALK ABOUT FUCKING ZEALOUS AS FUCK BROADWAY WOMEN. WE TALK ABOUT LITTLE ORPHAN ANNIE, ANITA FROM WEST SIDE STORY, FANNIE BRICE, AND IN THE PROCESS, WE DISCOVER HOW FUCKING FUCKED UP PETER PAN IS.
WHAT MUSICAL HEROINES DO YOU FUCKING LOVE?
ANYONE WHO HAS A FUCKING BRAIN KNOWS HOW HARD IT IS TO INVENT SOMETHING. LIKE MAGGIE THOUGHT SHE INVENTED FAST-MOVING URBAN SIDEWALKS WITH ROOFS THE OTHER DAY BUT SHE WAS REALLY JUST THINKING OF TRAINS. FUCK, THAT'S ALREADY BEEN INVENTED. BUT FUCKING SHIRLEY JACKSON AND HEDY LAMARR WERE SO FUCKING SMART THAT THEY BOTH CONTRIBUTED TO INVENTIONS THAT WE ALL STILL USE TODAY! LIKE, A LOT! THESE WOMEN ARE SO FUCKING COOL AND SMART, WE SHOULD BE SCREAMING ABOUT THEM FROM THE FUCKING ROOFTOPS PRETTY MUCH CONSTANTLY. LET'S START TODAY!
ANNIE FUCKING OAKLEY AND FLY ROD MOTHERFUCKING CROSBY GET IT SO! HARD!!! WE LOVE THESE OUTDOOR SPORTSLADIES AND THEIR BAD-ASS ATTITUDES AND THEIR SHOWMANSHIP AND THEIR ATHLETIC PROWESS AND THEIR HUMILITY AND THEIR VERY FUCKING IMPRESSIVE AWARDS AND RECORDS. WE WANT TO BE LIKE THEM! JUST, LIKE, A TINY LITTLE BIT LIKE THEM WOULD BE FINE! JUST ONE-ONE HUNDREDTH AS COOL AS THEY ARE WOULD SUFFICE!